Say Yes

2020 has been a year of processing and reflection for me. I haven't been to a counseling session in well over a year. Yet, there is still so much to work through. One thing that I briefly became aware of is the loss of so many things and people over much of my adult life and how I never really stopped for a moment to grieve those losses. I've been programmed to ‘keep it moving’. With every loss, a piece of me went away with it.

The very first loss was the ending of my childhood/teen years with becoming a mother at the tender age of 16. From that moment on I would begin the process of ‘keep it moving’ without ever looking back. That's when working and schooling turned into an incessant need to be successful as a means of being accepted or validated since I didn't feel that at home.

Over the years, that need for success would turn into me being there for others more to compensate for when it felt like no one was there for me. Friendships would become my source of acceptance & validation but would turn out not to fulfill what I felt I was lacking. I lost my voice and sense of self in so many ways.

In reflecting on the many challenges and forms of loss I've encountered over the course of my adult years, it became clear to me that it was okay to stop and say yes. That is, say yes to taking time for me to grieve in whatever way I needed to in order to fully embrace who I am and who God has called me to be. To step back for a bit to dive into His word as a much needed reminder of His promises and the purpose He made in advance for me.

So, are you ready to say yes? Yes to finding who you were created to be and no longer seeking what the world tells you to be? But now instead what God says? Let's chat ☺️

16 & pregnant ~ circa 99’